Love is...

Love is...the ability to make someone's day infinitely better? The capacity to feel like you want to be there for someone through all their days, good and bad?

Some say that you can't love someone until you know yourself.

But, you know what?...will you EVER completely know yourself? We're constantly growing and our lives are constantly being shaped through each experience we gain. We never stop changing. So, how on earth could you ever completely know yourself let alone someone else?

Impossible. But what IS possible is being able to accept and feel that spark. That passion. That fire.

Why deny a feeling like that?

Why should something so profoundly simple to feel...be so complex to understand?

Maybe it's a naive thought. But what if...what if we just remembered why we fell in love in the first place. What if we just FELT it? What if we ignored all those "circumstances". What if we just let our emotions run wild?

All rules set aside. There are NO rules to this feeling.

You never really KNOW why. You just feel it. And then you just...let go. Your heart takes off like a speeding bullet. You can't stop it. It's gone. You can't control it. It's this unbelievable rush you get when no words are spoken.

And knowing that I can make your day infinitely better..take away your stress for the day...and the next. And the day after?

"Love as though you have never been hurt before..."

God has given me the ability to love over and over again...and though I know the repercussions of when things go wrong, I welcome it with open arms because I know how TRULY amazing it feels like when things go right.

If life is truly short, and we are to live for the moments, then I want to be able to love every single second.

"Mr. Right Now"?

This excerpt of an article that popped up on CNN Lifestyle this morning poses a question to my inner "Go-Girl" self. This isn't typically one of the usual things I'd post on my happy blog, but I'd be interested to see what other people think about this. Feel free to comment and debate if you so chose. (Particularly the last paragraph).

"Should You Settle for Mr. Right Now?", Lori Gottlieb

.........................

"Gottlieb interviewed an array of experts -- sociologists, behavioral economists, social psychologists, and statisticians -- who presented evidence about...why women are fundamentally the choosier sex.

There are so many really wonderful men out there, men who want commitment, who want to be married, who are attractive and smart and interesting," Gottlieb says. "They may not be movie-star attractive, they may be awkward at first, they may not fit our cultural image of who Mr. Right or who Prince Charming is. But we shouldn't pass them up. Look what happened to me."

What happened to Gottlieb?

Educated and independent, she is gorgeous, vivacious, and sharply witty. She went to Stanford Medical School; she has written several books, two of which have been optioned by Hollywood. In other words, she is such a fantastic catch that she assumed she would never have to settle, that a Superhusband -- romantic, brilliant, baggage-free -- would emerge from the ether and sweep her into an eternally fulfilling marriage.

But, she says, she missed the boat -- several times -- by focusing on potential mates' flaws and expecting too much. Now 42, she has a 4-year-old son, courtesy of a sperm donor.

"We are taught as young women in this culture that compromise is a bad word," she says. "We tell each other: 'You go, girl. You get the best. You deserve the best.' It's not so much narcissism as a false cultural perception of our worth. We want the ten, because we think we're a ten. But we're missing the fact that we're not. Nobody is. Men have flaws, but we have flaws, too."

..............

In conclusion, personally...I think Lori makes a good point regarding the fact that "no one is perfect".

But...I'm only 24! So, for now...I have the right to be choosy and to experience more different types of loves, and most importantly to develop myself into what I feel to be my very best! "Life is TOO short to be partially happy!"

As for "settling" for the "Mr. (or Ms.) Enough" at one point of your life...it depends on when and whether you truly want to be married or not.

If you feel the NEED to be settled and married ASAP, then SURE...you will probably end up "settling". I mean...that's why the terminology was coined, right?

And that's probably why most people DO end up "settling" at some pre-determined age penciled in by society. Because our friends and family around us are getting married and you're like "crap! must settle!" or "awwww...I want that, NOW, too!!!"

But I think ultimately, the key to truly being happy with another is to know yourself completely first. Then...you're not "settling", you're "accepting".

You both are truly happy with each other for exactly who you are and loving every single ounce of each other - the sexyness and the faults!

And to get to that stage of making a decision that concrete, you're certainly going to have to be well aware of your wants and needs...and most importantly yourself.

Ultimately, it all comes down to your ability to understand your feelings and happiness level. Also...I think the more logical you are, the less you feel with your heart. Call it "wishy washy", but it's true.

And that, my friend, requires a mélange of intense self-love and empathy for your fellow human beings.

2010 Revelations = 100% Love.

Talk about kicking the year off with revelations and wide-mood swings.

I cried on New Years day at about 3am in the morning at Keith's place.

I cried a lot. About relationships. About the "what if's" and the "why not"s?

...

A few hours later come mid-day, I received news that a special Kiwanian whom so many Circle K'ers loved so dearly...passed away from cancer.

*blink* I cried again.

I never had the opportunity to get to know him very well, but from the few moments that we did speak, I could see how much he truly loved those around him. It showed.

...

A few days later I flew to Vegas to help Helen and Alice out at the CES convention, reuniting with old friends and developing new friendships.

To see so much passion and love oozing from all sorts of things (ie: electronics) is always something impressive to me. Be it rubber or computers.

Reunited with The Casanovas, Rachel, Tiffany, and Cheriz over good eats and drinks.

I saw John Legend. He was only 25 feet away. I screamed so much my voice chords are still wrecked as of today. The uncanny thing is that Bento photoshoped a pic of me at his party last year...and it came true!

And then I caught up with an old friend...after not seeing each other for about a year...I cried. Again. Because so many good memories came rushing back.

---

One conversation in particular with a new friend...struck out most to me: "Even if you are able to love for just that one moment...that is a beautiful thing."

I think this is something that I have officially realized this month in 2010...and that is...if the opportunity to love arises, I'm going to continue to do so because as much as it may hurt...something deep down inside tells me that it was all well-worth it.

But to remember all at the same time...that the most important thing is to not half-ass anything. To love completely. So that I can be 100% happy.

And that the greatest way to live...is to live to love.

The One

I no longer know if 'The One' exists, but I do believe there is someone in this world that I can truly make happy and can fulfill all my desires...

And that person is me.

I am my #1.

Followed closely by my best friends and family.

"Live to Love".

I have a lot of love to give.

And no matter how many times I've fallen in and out of love, I think I'll always have the propensity to do so again.

Why?

Because no matter what you do, or who you're do it with, or where you are on this planet, I believe...that the feeling of caring about someone and having that person care about you with equal or greater magnitude in return is...the greatest passion to experience.

And when I think about the past, the future, and the present I realize...that...this feeling isn't about how much or how little one has in common with the other...but more about...that connection. The desire to care. The desire to truly share ones life with another.

And the reassurance that you are going to care about the things I do...non-unconditionally. The accomplishments. The failures. And that I will care about yours. And we will grow from it.

And that I'm not alone.

And that YOU will never alone now that you have me.

I think everyone is capable of love. And I think everyone has the ability to care. But whether or not someone is ready for this intensity...is another story. They were right when they said, "You can't love someone, until you love yourself."

I think...I have a lot of love to share becauseI have the ability to...care...a lot...

Perhaps it is that simple.

"500 Days of Summer" - A Modern Day Love Story (Though it's in denial that it's not)

"I guess I just figured, why make something disposable like a building when you can make something that last forever, like a greeting card." ~ Tom from 500 Days of Summer

A guy that's infatuated about a girl? That wants to find "the one"? THAT, for starters, is one of the many things that makes this a remarkable movie.

What I loved most about this movie was the constant juxtaposition of feelings of happiness and agony in the most chaotic manner (which is JUST how life is!). The concepts of relationship "expectations" vs. "reality" were addressed -- something I...and I'm sure many people, can identify with.

Anyway...let's cut to the chase:

I like this movie a lot because it's genuinely...real: the romantic experience you share with an individual is momentary. It's only for now.

At this point, the common hopeless romantic would shout "Well...why just now?! When it can last forever!"

Well...you see...that's the beauty of this movie...is that it compels you to NOT only live for those...big "AHA!" moments...but instead to truly enjoy every experience, then to simply live and let go as needed.

So you see...the momentariness of love/relationships...is not a bad thing, as much as it may hurt. Because...even if things don't work out...you're bound to find someone just as amazing if not more amazing...or at least someone you can once again share those feelings with...in a matter of time. Just open your eyes.

All it takes is time. An open mind. The willingness to love again. "...To love as if you have never been hurt before." Resilience.

And the important thing to remember is that...THE WORLD IS NOT ENDING just because your person of infatuation is no longer there.

*nod*

The second concept I enjoyed that was addressed in this movie is the oh so popular question of... "What is Love?"

Answer: It's simply indescribable.

Tom: "What happens when you fall in love?"
Summer: "You believe in that stuff?"
Tom: "It's love...it's not Santa Claus."

It just...BAM! hits you when you least expect it. You can feel as comfortable as you may with someone and spend every single day with them...but...when you feel it...you FEEL it. And you can't do anything about it. (Just like how Tom felt for Summer, and as Summer felt for the guy she ended up marrying).

It's just...a feeling of intense passion for someone.

To feel such great intensity towards someone...

That energy to care for someone whether they are "the one" or not...it's a beautiful thing that I truly admire.

...

Gosh. What a great movie.

Been thinking about it for the last many hours now.

Ah, just got watch it already! :)

Pictures of Love

They always say, "Don't be sad because it's over. Be happy because it happened."

Sometimes I find the need to repeat this kind of thing about 10 x's in my head.

But it's hard...when you pick up a picture of the past and it makes you want to cry...but then you ask yourself...well...why?

For those of you have ever been in love...or even to have developed a deep relationship with any friend...you must know how it feels to look at those old pictures and have memories come flooding back knowing things are no longer the way they used to be.

But...at the same time...we need to remind ourselves of why we took photographs of those moments in the first place: to capture good memories together. To freeze time for that happy or whatever moment of inspiration.

So when we look at those pictures...instead of feeling sad, mad, or...scared. We just need to remember that it's because of moments like those that make us who we are today: Stronger. More beautiful. Greater.

Pictures of Love...aren't meant to evoke sadness...but instead...to portray a happiness that one was simply lucky to have experienced and a foundation to an even happier future.